I say "our" in the familial sense, but really I will be the one sharing my stories, thoughts, and experiences with you. My name is Betty Fox and I'm starting this blog to share our songs for the next album in a way I've never seen done before. Over the course of the next few months, I will be rolling out our album one song a week; sharing the stories behind our songs, along with live videos of these songs, posting lyrics and giving you insight into the the soul of this band with as much transparency as I can muster. It's a lofty goal, but I'm committed to connecting with you beautiful souls through music and I know that you enjoy a good story.
In this detached social media climate, I am finding that the illusion of connection is all around us but the disconnect comes with fear. One of the blessings that has risen from the ashes of my hardships is that I am no longer afraid. Here you will get it all, the good the bad, and the ugly. Here comes some truth...
This album is autobiographical and the title, Peace in Pieces came from a conversation I had with a store clerk in passing and thought to myself, that would be a great song... It's about how peace of mind comes piece by piece and these songs are my struggle and my triumph. (I don't know how to talk about all this just yet. I don't know how to sugarcoat grief and depression to make it an easier pill for you to swallow so you keep reading, so I won't. If you are one of those people who don't like the bad and the ugly; stop reading now.) The truth is that since starting this band I have suffered extreme losses and wrote songs about them. I have also overcome tremendously and I have wrote songs about it. Those songs will be featured on my next album, and I suppose I have stopped trying to justify why that is important for me and my art. In this post and subsequent posts, I am putting my why out there for you to dissect and consume at your leisure. It may not be the most happy story, but it is mine and I want to share it with you if you'll listen.
I don't know why it's taboo in our culture for humans to share our human experiences. To show our emotions and tell our stories seems to be a basic human interaction, but even as I am writing this I feel the ever-present guilt of honesty and worry of how my story will be taken. I vehemently oppose this unspoken objection to reality that most people impose on me. I was told to ask myself why I am sharing my story with you, and the answer I came up with is this: WHY NOT? We are all just people sharing human experiences and in a world that is building walls, I'm here to build bridges. This is me building my bridge to you. This is my story.
On May 18th, 2014, my father lost his battle with ALS. My family and I watched him slowly deteriorate into weaker and weaker states, visiting him once a month while the less understanding members of my band groaned for not making money that week. Unsurprisingly, I had no clue what to do about it, but I did loose my shit and without the support of family and friends or knowledge of how to deal with it, I began to drink very heavily. I ended an 8 year relationship. I have been displaced from my home, totaled my car and fought financial battles. I have battled addiction, depression, anxiety, and grief. I lost best friends. I sat by my favorite person in the whole world and held her hand as she took her last breath... and played a gig the next day. I watched my dog get hit by a car at a gig, and played anyway because by that point I knew there was nothing in the world that would make me feel better than playing music. In the midst of it all I often found myself wondering if I would ever be happy again - and how did I get here - and how can I possibly keep going - and why in the actual fuck do I get up on the stage and have to make all these people smile when all I want to do is curl up in bed and cry? I thought about quitting, and my response was always to lean in harder. I think a normal response to immense loss is to question everything. It changes a person and what they exist for, and I'd be lying if I said I wasn't better for it. I have reached the depths of these questions and I have found the answers on the stage. My soul responded easily; I do this because I would die without it. I am here for connection. The music saved me. Every. Single. Time. This music is my best friend, my healer, my confidant. I have found myself in it. I now know that I unknowingly created a lot of the chaos I endured myself to cover up my sadness. I have learned to stop doing that and my life is amazing today. The other side of that coin is that I faced legitimate losses that would throw us all into a tailspin. I found my peace of mind, piece by piece, through the storm and the music. I retreated, licked my wounds, found the light and chased it. This album is my coming out party, and this blog is your invitation.
Thank you for joining me on this journey!
Each blog post will contain the following:
- A new live video of a song
- A video blog of the story behind it
- Lyrics
- A blog posting
- A weekend recap with pictures and videos from the previous week's shows
- A list of upcoming events and where to find us
- New pictures, videos, or press clippings of the band as they may arise
I'll be sharing these posts every Monday, so stay tuned!
